It is a sabbath for me. No, not a religious day, not because it's a Sunday. It is a day of reflection over the last bit of time and possibly all of the time I've been afforded a memory.
Before leaving Warsaw for home, I was chatting with my Sis. She was sending good thoughts for safe travels and I responded with a few thoughts about my not having any regrets and have had a good life, so hoped no one would be sad if I die in the next bit of time. Don't get me wrong, I'm hoping I have lots more time here. There are things I want to do, just not sure I have all of these completely visualised and on a list as of yet.
This trip to Europe was a fantastic opportunity for me. Flying home, I worried I hadn't taken full advantage of the opportunity, but most of that was fatigue. I'm sure there are things I could've done to capitalize more fully when interacting with clients and colleagues. However, I did absorb a lot of information. I listened, I contributed, I debated (though not much). Today is a day for me to disseminate that information. I am working through that exercise, but not in this forum. :-)
What an adventure I've had to date. Now, I haven't attempted any extreme sports. I've not tried to climb Mt. Everest or bungee jumped from a bridge. Unless you count white-water rafting. Now that was an adrenaline rush. I have worked hard to save money and take trips to faraway places. I've made sure that my children had some awesome opportunities and experiences, too. There are things I've never done, that I'd like to experience. Snow skiing would be new, rock climbing, love to try kayaking. I enjoyed canoeing and rafting and this would strengthen my upper body.
What I have begun to do recently is take a hard look at my life. These last few years I've wandered with minimal direction. My kids grew up and left the nest and I think I've floundered. I've thrown myself into work and being attentive to my hubby, but not much more. I've taken some big steps in changing my lifestyle this summer, no smoking cigarettes, no overeating, beginning a fitness regimen. It's been stressful. It's been challenging. I've bored people to tears, because this is all I've wanted to talk about. I have spent a large part of my life trying to attend to other people and being somewhat selfless (no not completely as I'm no Mother Theresa). I have a thirst and hunger I need to fulfill. I'm just not sure how to do it or what it is I truly want to do. I need something beyond work and family life. Now it's time for me to find it.