31 December, 2010

So long 2010, Hello 2011

I've never liked endings. I hate to finish a book. I'll drag out the last two chapters for days sometimes. This year feels different for some reason. Well a big reason, but I won't spill those beans here for now.

I've had interesting time off. I've ridden, spent time with girls, Mom, and siblings. So very nice to have this time with family. For the last 30 some years this has been a very full week. Christmas, my ex-husband's birthday, our anniversary and New Year's all within 8 days. This was the first year I didn't say happy birthday to him since 1974. It's best, but feels very odd. 

I feel out of place. I have for months. Need to get comfy in my skin again. Working on it. Working on me. Just taking deep breaths, trying to find center and ground myself.

Time to set goals, working on that but have lots to do still.

Happy New Year to you all. May you find peace but most importantly, happiness.

Publish Post

28 December, 2010

so much to learn

today was great!  

first I shopped for sunglasses. I swear between HR monitors and sunglasses I am B R O K E! ha ha  I looked and tried on and asked questions, but one of my best friends took time with me and helped me find what I wanted.

went mtn biking with a friend on fire roads. 2 people, not in prime shape, but taking time, raising the heart rate well above threshhold, and just laughing having fun and getting to know each other a little better.

Then dinner with brother and sister, Something that took way too long to do. I thoroughly enjoyed it and was engrossed in all of the conversation. I now know why I miss them so much.

Wish I knew how to do love the right way. Maybe it will come, maybe it won't. But one thing is for sure, there are lot's of people in my life that I care for deeply. Maybe that should be the most important thing.

peace to all

26 December, 2010

The best gift

for me has nothing to do with wrappings and bows. I wanted what I always want: Time with family and friends. My girls gave me the most precious gift, time to spend with them. Late in the afternoon we gathered at daughter #1's place. We cooked, visited and chatted and caught up on each other's lives. Of course we ate. We ate from the time the door closed behind us until we pulled out of the drive. I'm still stuffed, 24 hours later. Leftovers might have something to do with that.

One of these days we'll get the whole family together, again. I'm starting to look at real estate. My apartment is small and inconvenient for entertaining. I've been invited to friend's parties over the last year and a half and I truly want to reciprocate. 

Another gift, I gave myself was time off the bike. I've only been off the bike like this when I broke my collar bone. Before today I'd ridden 3 times since my race in Bend. I've gained weight, gotten lazy and my hips ache and don't work so well. Today I got on the trainer for an hour. I plan to spend at least 2 hours on the bike most of the days from now to next week. I'm on vacation until next year! I need to get organized. I need to set some goals for 2011. Both for racing and for work and even personally. We'll see how this goes.

I hope everyone has received the gifts they wanted.



24 December, 2010

End of year celebrations

Many of us celebrate differently, but most of us begin to reflect on the closing year and start to plan and set goals for the new one coming. 

I'm not a religious person, but respect those that are. Mostly, I want to be with family and friends. It's not so easy though. Work schedules are all over the place and the family has gotten fragmented. I'm thrilled to get to spend time with both my girls on Christmas. My oldest is hosting, very nice change of pace. The three of us have had lots of change over the last couple of years. I'm just grateful that we all are in the same town, love each other deeply and are able to make some time for our small family unit. 

To all of my family, friends and anyone that reads this:

much love to you. I wish for peace, serenity and above all happiness for us all. 

be well, laugh as much as you can and know you are loved deeply


21 December, 2010

So, what's with

my face breaking out these days? My chin is a total mess. argh

oh, and I let my subscription to online dating expire. It was dumb to do it anyway. The 3  months the same people were recycled over and over. All of a sudden, once my subscription expires I have 20 emails, tons of winks (still most are over 60), etc. I swear I think it's a gimic to get me to re-up. Waste of time and money. 

I have decided I don't need to date. I'm completely clueless. And will just mess it up somehow. Besides, it seems I have no idea how to meet guys. I'm not hanging in bars.

Back to work and bike riding all the time once the weekend holiday is over. 


16 December, 2010

I'd trade it all

right now for a quiet evening with a gentle companion putting an arm around my shoulder and a chest I can to snuggle into.


back to bikes and work tomorrow!!!!

I tell myself, it can be simple and easy. not so sure that's reality though. mostly 'cause it's not all up to me. but why not? just spend time here and there. 

15 December, 2010

2010 CX Nationals, Bend OR part 3

So I left out some stuff. Thursday afternoon saw the first Singlespeed Championships @ Natz. What a race! Craig Alexander dominated, while wearing blue jean cutoffs. Did I mention that sunsets about 4:30 and it's pitch by 5:00? probably, so I repeat somethings and leave out others.
"running" up stairs @ Bend

I called B2 to let him know I would be happy to work the pit or be support for his race. Said he wasn't going to use the pit but I could grab his stuff at the start line. Just so happened one of the kids loaned him a pit bike. This was good as he needed it on the first lap. But he was able to pass quite a few once back on the course. His was another fun race to watch. Tilford dominated the race. It was raining at the start but by mid first lap had changed to snow, some of the biggest flakes I'd seen in a while. Temps dropped and snow filled the air. I'm glad I was able to support. That's what team mates are all about, right? well, friends too.

I missed a lot of the next race, but another Louisville cyclist was in that one. We cheered and rang our cowbells for him, too. Next came the 17/18 year olds. Two local boys from Red Zone and another from the Lionhearts were in this race. So exciting to watch! D2 came in third and his team mate came in 11th, barely missing top ten but had a most exciting race. When finished he was completely brown with mud and said his eyelids were frozen open due to the mud sticking to them. D2 left today for Eurocamp and is representing the US on Sunday at the world cup. Go D2!! 

Later in the afternoon they held the U23 race and another local male cyclist raced. I missed the majority of this one too. Then the last race of the day we had two more locals in the 30-34 AG. A fun race to cheer and run around the course trying to catch glimpses.

There are some great videos of the actions at http://www.cyclingdirt.org/video and photographs at http://galleries.cascadeeventphotography.com/g/2010_cx_nats
After the races, CAO and I went back to the room, cleaned up, packed, ate, napped and then went back for the Clydesdale races at 9:30 and the after party. Fun times. It was midnight before we hit the bed and set our alarms to get up at 4:15 to leave by 5 am. Her phone rang at 4, the airline saying her 2nd leg from Chicago to Cincy was cancelled. All workd out well in the end and she was able to reroute through Houston. 

Next year is in Madison, WI. I have a feeling it will be a very cold week as it will be 2nd week of January 2012. (not sure why they had to move the dates) It's within driving distance. So, I'll have to see if I can find another crazy person to drive up and share expenses.

I put my shoes and helmet on the trailer with my bike. I've wanted to ride my mtn bike since I got home, but have no shoes. so dumb But I'll drive to Cincy this weekend and pick up my stuff. A few friends that live up there are talking about a mtn bike ride on Saturday. I hope I can join them if logistics work out. 

I think I'm gonna miss my CX friends for the next months. I'll have to find something else to fill my weekends. I hope weather permits outdoor riding, but it looks like lots of trainer time for now. Next couple of weeks I need to think about goals for 2011, both personal and cycling. Need to start looking for permanent abode as well. Time to settle down, buy some furniture, unpack and get comfy.

peace everyone

CX Rules!!!

14 December, 2010

2010 CX Nationals, Bend OR part 2

Fresh kits, bikes loaded, and off to the CX venue. It was very cool and my only regret was that I didn't bag my feet. I've decided pre-riding a course is much better than riding blind, at least as a newbie. CAO pre-rode with me and she was glad she did, even though she could've the next day following her TT and the days' events. I did one lap, she did two. The water was a shock, the mud was tough and new to figure out but the soggy grass sucked the life energy out of my legs. I took my bike to the free bike wash put on by Pedro's while she rode her second lap. I was pooped and hungry. We headed back to the hotel for a nice dip in the hot tub and some food.

Thursday was tricky for me. She and the kids had their TTs the same time I was racing. I dropped her at the TT venue and they gave her a ride back to the main course after. I drove myself over to team parking. Got my trainer setup and started my warmup. We did all prep such as pinning numbers and mixing gatorade at the room. 27 women were at the start line for my race. I was 13th from the TT. I didn't wear a jacket or take a water bottle since there was no one there to hand them off to. I was surprised how comfortable I stayed without a jacket. I felt strong at the start, but several got past me before the water. I was holding my own and passed a couple of cyclists, but once we got to the soggy grass by the roadway I started losing some ground. I can't remember when except that I fell once on my left and once on my right sides. I was mud soaked, for sure. I never got off of my bike except for the stairs. They didn't put up barriers until the next day. The runup in the Bob's Redmill bowl had 3 lines, didn't matter which I took my rear wheel wanted to slide down the hill so I footed myself to the top on the left side and flew down the opposite side, which  scared me and made me pucker up. The flyover was fun, except I forgot to keep my pedals level on one lap and one bottomed out and bounced. The stairs were just torture for me. I know this will be a good place to start training and none too soon. Thinking about running the stairwells in the tower at work once a week starting in Jan.

The falls and stairs were my biggest time losers. I'm just glad I didn't get pulled, though I finished one lap down. I wasn't DFL, but not sure if that was because the last place woman had a mechanical or what. I was soaked and muddy and made my way to the jeep where I crawled up into, started the engine and slowly began to peel off the muddy kit. This seemed to take me forever. My legs and feet were covered in mud even after removing all attire. Towel, dry socks and warm head covering were all instrumental in my not getting chilled to the bone. My memory fades after this. I know we go get a nice hot bath and go out to eat.  I was so happy to have all of my racing behind me!

Friday is her race. It's not until 1:00. The girls start at 8:30 so I stay to see the start of their race. Then I head over to the TT course since B2 is the only one over there and he goes off at 9:30ish. He did great from what I saw. Others in front of him were riding their brakes on a downhill section but he flew like the wind going down it. I cheered and took pictures with my blackberry. Should've bought a camera. Once he was done I drove back over to the main venue. We watched the boys race. I grabbed some lunch. Then I took her spare wheels to the pits and stayed in the pits for her. I was so glad I could be there, cheering her on as she came through each time. She did great, finished on the lead lap! I'm amazed at the season she had. She was blown off her bike in May and broke her pelvis in several places. Came to CX season, her 2nd and improved with each race and coming in at the top of the series for her age/cat.

If CAO hadn't gone with me my experience would've been so much different. Not nearly as good and pleasant. I would've been lost and most likely depressed had I been solo. She is a gem.

more later...

peace to all

13 December, 2010

2010 CX Nationals, Bend OR part 1

Not sure where to start. I had planned to do this months ago. My first away vacation in several years and my first solo vacation ever. The furthest northwest I'd been before was Tahoe. I posted up to see if anyone else going needed hotel room, no one responded and I thought I posted too early. I borrowed a bike box and went to the LBS and had B2 tell me how to take the bike apart as I did it. I figured I would need to know how to do this and put back together once I got to Bend. 

Wow, how quickly things change. The Cincy kids team, Lionhearts, posted up they had room for bikes in their trailer. I emailed back and forth and made the arrangements. I would put my bike on their trailer at Brookside (Indy). They left right after the races and tag team drove (3 of them) around the clock until they arrived at Bend. They were able to get team parking (at a nice discount), which made a huge difference in logistics for the week. Then I get an email from C.A.O. She had applied for her upgrade to Cat3 and wanted to go to Natz. Asked about sharing room and rental $$. Man, I'm so glad she did.

Our flights landed in Portland on Tuesday within 15 minutes of each other. I upgraded the Ford Taurus I had reserved to a Jeep, another great move. We grabbed lunch before we got too far out of the city, then drove over the mtn pass towards our destination. It was beautiful as everything was covered in fresh snow, but the roads were in great shape with plenty of salt/cinder/sand for traction. We got a text saying the bikes had arrived and were in team parking. We met up, got the bikes loaded and checked out the venue. I'd hoped to be able to pre-ride the  TT course, but daylight was gone by 4:30 and it was pitch by 5. We headed to the hotel and checked in. I got on the trainer, while CAO went into logistics mode, she is an equestrian. Tarp was purchased and installed in the back of Jeep for bikes. Great idea! She also picked up some groceries, so we were set. 

Wednesday was my TT and being at 11 had plenty of time. We arrived at the course early enough to walk part of it. I went back to the jeep to warm up and she walked the rest to give me some insight. We had gotten word early that they changed the course, taking out 2 sections deemed unsafe as well as leaving out barriers. The course was covered in snow and slush 3 inches deep. There were very few places where you could see the gravel bleed through. I was glad I had ridden snow on Sunday in Indy, but once was not enough experience. I was tentative on the downhills, but knew enough to stay off the brakes. The large runup was a long steep sheet of ice and snow. It There was one place, a 180 and a runup (if I remember right) where I got off the bike. I went to get back on fell on my right side. I just wanted to get up, back on the bike and finish. I heard someone telling me to get in the small chain ring, then I could get going. I found out later that 2 of the guys from home were standing there watching and telling me this. I had no idea at the time. I just wanted to get the bike moving and finish. I finished next to last, but not all who were racing did the TT. This was a great experience. So glad to have CAO there. I wish the other two had said my name so I would've been more aware of their presence. She got me back to the hotel as I was soaked down my right side and freezing. Got a warm bath and ate some lunch. We then got fresh kits together and went to the CX course to pre-ride. 

to be continued...

p.s. failed to mention how scared I was on that TT course, it was sketchy

01 December, 2010

Final OVCX race is almost here

and I toyed with racing both days. I'd really like the opportunity to up my points. But with next weeks trip, I've decided to save my $ on gas and entry fee. I'm hoping my fitness improves this week. I was looking forward to one more CX practice today, but it was canceled. It's all good, everything must come to an end. right? Can't wait to see the ladies one more time on Sunday. This has been such a fun year of racing with all of them.

Project delivered today, but the file corrupted. woo hoo!!! Year end review went much better than I expected. WOOT!!!

513 extended an invite to their year-end celebration. Totally cool of them to ask the 502. I'd really like to attend. We'll see.

It's turned cold, which is probably good since next week will be frigid in Bend I think. I wonder if there will be mud or snow or ice. I've never raced in any of those conditions. Another opportunity for a first of many firsts these past two years.

I'm anxious and excited to head to Bend. I'm lucky a fellow cyclist is meeting me and sharing car and room. First solo vacation ever for me. I'm so ready to get away. It's been too long.