We all go through life thinking we are in control. Or worse yet, trying to control what others do, think, etc. We only have control over ourselves, and with me that is still a challenge!
My daughters apologised yesterday for not having a gift for me. I explained that they gave me exactly what I hoped for, time to spend with them and theirs. What more could anyone want? Time to talk, joke, laugh, love and learn something new about each other, hopefully. I think I went wrong somewhere for them to feel guilty for not having a gift.
I need to change my expectations of others. They will act and react as they must and not according to what I want or expect. I need to turn things upside down to find the good stuff.
I have lots of serious thinking about what I want to do over the next period of time. Examine where I am, what I really want to do, and try to figure out how I can begin to live the latest adventure in life. I've spent a lot of time changing what I was, no more smoking, no more sedentary life. I've also had to deal with physical changes, like my thyroid going haywire and menopause striking!
Now I need to plan, refine, take advantage. It's not going to be easy. Some things will be difficult. Some things will be great challenges. I need to "clean house", throw some things out, blow the dust off of others, and hope all my decisions are for the good. I need to separate the fantasy from the reality. Where I can, I will make the fantasy into reality. Where I can't, I will hold those fantasies in a special place to take out at some point in the future.