One more day left in this year of 2008

It's been an odd year, full of turmoil and people losing jobs and sitting on a house that still hasn't sold. But it could be worse. All of my family are still close. We have our good health (for the most part).

I took a short ride today. A bowl of bean soup and some cheese and crackers for dinner last night really wasn't enough fuel for a good ride today. Nutrition is key! I planned a 20 and wound up with 15 miles out Route Rd and back. The club had a 40 miler, but didn't have enough time to get back, bathe and make my hair appt.

The ride was challenging for more than the nutrition issue. I get about halfway down Route Rd and a car pulls out of a driveway to my left (opposite side of road). The driver and I look at each other, I keep pedalling and he keeps pulling across the road right at me! I start screaming and waving my left arm. He comes within 2 inches of my front wheel, I don't know how we missed each other. He just pulled away and then made the next left about 150 yards up the street. What's up with that? No harm, no foul I guess. But I also have to think I have to be a very lucky woman. I know some many that have been hit or bit by a dog among other mishaps. I'm sure my odds will run out, they always do.

After coming home and taking a nice soak in the tub, I took off to do a little clothes shopping. After picking up a few items, I made my hair appt with 5 minutes to spare! ;-) The girl I go to is my oldest's age, they've known each other since they were babies (had the same babysitter). I put my hair in her hands and she gave me a nice trim, relayered, and soft perm. Yes!

I have to work 4 hours tomorrow morning and then start taking down the decorations. Not sure I'll get to ride unless it's on the trainer. Festivities will be close to home, small number of friends, peaceful and safe. Then start out New Year's with a polar bear ride and potluck.

Next time I'l try to update on what I've learned so far about my Heart Rate monitor I got for Christmas.

Happy New Year's Eve, everyone! (almost)

Time off is good

So, after so much massive caloric intake it was time to burn off some food! I can't believe how 3 days screws with your body! I have to get back to eating fresh fruit and veggies and away from all this rich food.

Yesterday was great riding. The beginning of the ride was close so I rode to and fro which added 20 miles for a total of 46. The temps were high of 71F and winds 20 - 30 mph. There were a couple of times the cross winds had me leaning further than I've ever leaned, even on a turn! I have to get faster on hills! Especially if I'm going to be any good at all next year at the games. We were having a great time and all was going well, about 15 of us and we were all hanging. The first big hill I slowed, Rick was with me. He was fixed and had already ridden 40 earlier. The RC fell back, I think it'd been sometime since he'd been out on his bike and he was working hard. Oh yeah, the ride start, we saw a couple of young men pull in and bring out a suitcase, then a LMPD officer and another pulled in. They had a python! Wild stuff.

I finally got out this morning and walked briskly. Much different with 35F and a little breezy. Put in 25 minutes and was in my HR zone for 21 of it. Tomorrow I'll actually run. It's got to help my heart and overall recovery.

Today I rode the regular Sunday 2:00 out of Heine Bros. Nice crowd of 35 or more. Temps were about 45 or so and the sun was glorious! I rode with a nice size group most of the ride, This made River Road so much more fun. Of course everyone else handles Glenview no prob and I drop back. Murph and I rode in together. He's a very good dude.

Only thing on tomorrow's schedule is a 7:00 pm ride. Guess I'll get out and run, go buy new tires for my car, maybe have the LBS mechanic check out my bike and if there's enough sunlight left ride a few miles. Have to see how it all plays out.

Expectations

We all go through life thinking we are in control. Or worse yet, trying to control what others do, think, etc. We only have control over ourselves, and with me that is still a challenge!

My daughters apologised yesterday for not having a gift for me. I explained that they gave me exactly what I hoped for, time to spend with them and theirs. What more could anyone want? Time to talk, joke, laugh, love and learn something new about each other, hopefully. I think I went wrong somewhere for them to feel guilty for not having a gift.
I need to change my expectations of others. They will act and react as they must and not according to what I want or expect. I need to turn things upside down to find the good stuff.

I have lots of serious thinking about what I want to do over the next period of time. Examine where I am, what I really want to do, and try to figure out how I can begin to live the latest adventure in life. I've spent a lot of time changing what I was, no more smoking, no more sedentary life. I've also had to deal with physical changes, like my thyroid going haywire and menopause striking!

Now I need to plan, refine, take advantage. It's not going to be easy. Some things will be difficult. Some things will be great challenges. I need to "clean house", throw some things out, blow the dust off of others, and hope all my decisions are for the good. I need to separate the fantasy from the reality. Where I can, I will make the fantasy into reality. Where I can't, I will hold those fantasies in a special place to take out at some point in the future.

Merry Christmas!

I have precious few moments alone on this holiday. Hubby has left to get Mom. My oldest and her hubby spent the night after an evening with Hubby's family. It was a twin fest, where the babies (almost a year old) were the evening's entertainment.

I will have an open door, most likely revolving today. Everyone is free to come and go as their busy schedules permit. The house cleaning was left for this morning, as was most of the cooking. So the house will be as free of animal fur as possible and full of warm oven smells most of the day.

I hope for patience and wisdom to keep silent. I'm so looking forward to the brother and sister, nieces and nephews, daughters and theirs and mother and hubby.

No more mornings of wakening to the hustle and bustle of packages being ripped open, ah's and oh's.

Time to get back to the cooking and preparing!

Time off! Now is the time to really work hard

Yesterday was my last day in the office until 5 January. I got home and the hubby and his boys were playing music. I ate a few bits of spaghetti, got geared up, and rode the trainer for 2 hours while listening to tunes on youtube. It felt so good to spin out into a zone and sweat bullets. I've discovered Sia, she's real bluesy, but I was spinning into oblivion with her in my ears.

Today was "try to remember it's not a race" while finishing the gift purchasing and grocery shopping. What an adrenaline rush! All while driving on slickery roads and listening to a new accident being reported every few minutes. But alas, no snow this year for Christmas.

I have a plan to work hard these two weeks. on the bike and starting to run. What I want is to sign up for the triple crown and race the spring cycling series. Hmm, ambitious yep, but what the hell? I am well past half my life expectancy.

Time to work on the bike too. Dixie is in Yuma. Wants me to visit. sounds good if I can float a tic for me and bike.

Merry Christmas

Rationalise - never satisfied?

First of all, I'm a sad individual. Took Mom to church, then was going to get some work done. Next half hour spent trying to find a wireless network to hook into. Now my battery is on the verge of sleep mode and I still won't get any work done. Did you know that there are tons of people with wireless and not enabled security? Shhh, don't say anything!

I got to yesterday's ride start and saw several people I've not seen in a while. Many came up to me and asked where I'd been! I've been riding, just not the regular rides, I told them. It was good to see several in the group. I was feeling fairly strong and the temps were in the high 30s so no wheezing issues. I rode up front with another cyclist I just met and we hung on the front together until Northwestern Parkway, where he dropped me. I worked hard to keep 18 - 20 mph average, just couldn't stay on his wheel. I kept thinking I would see the rest of the group as I circled Shawnee and headed back towards Bank St, but never saw another cyclist. Now that was just weird.

When I turned ont 6th Street I saw a group of 5 that left early from the start, at least 5 to 10 minutes early. I started sprinting to catch up, but kept getting caught by the traffic signals. At one stoplight, I told a gentleman at the bus stop that I just couldn't catch up to those guys. He was very nice and chatted until the light went green, as I pedalled away he told me to be safe. Nice person. I think I've said before, I try to say hello to people while riding. I think it goes back to my Dad waving at people while driving. It's important to be friendly and show people niceties and courtesies.

As I passed Kentucky, I caught the guys that left early. I hung with them all the way to Iroquois. Except for one two block stint. I getting stronger on the hill, but still slower than I want to be. Finally a couple of the guys from behind passed me on this hill. I kept wondering where they were.

It was a good ride, and though I'm not happy with my average speed, I felt strong all day and really didn't mind riding solo quite so much. The cold zaps your energy so quickly. I need to start packing a gel or two in my jersey. You don't realise until the end of 2 and a half hours how spent you are and then I'm starving, too!

So I've rationalised my stealing wireless and never satisfied with my cycling speed. :-)

A day of fond memories

Today my Daddy would've been 83 years old. He's been gone eight and a half years. I miss him dearly and think of him often, though not as often as a couple of years ago. That makes me sad to realise that I don't think of him daily anymore. He was a good man, had sound advice. Enjoyed a hearty debate. So much has changed since he died. Mom sold her house and bought a patio home. Brother got divorced. Sister got divorced and remarried. My oldest got married. He had a laugh that is still memorable. He loved to pull jokes, especially on Mom.

When we leave someone's house I will say, "gotta go, gotta go" like he would. When I leave Mom's or a relative's house, I honk my horn as I pull away, just like he did. As I drive down the road, I will look at people in their cars and wave, just like he did. I miss him calling me, Sherri Jane.

Don't get me wrong, he was a disciplinarian. He could be stern when necessary. He taught high school biology and coached basketball, football, and golf. He taught learning impaired children during summer school. He loved working with kids. He didn't make much money and truth be known we were probably on the edge of poverty, but we never knew it. Spent so many nights in the gym and riding the bus going to ball games. The smell of popcorn still brings back memories from those days so long ago.

I'm so happy I have these memories.

Happy Birthday Daddy

So, what's with the obsessive compulsiveness?

Go from one thing to another or three! I wouldn't mind if all those things were good for you, but just like tobacco some things are detrimental. But you still get drawn to them, like a moth to a flame, a fly to manure. Too much of anything isn't good.

I worked about an hour on Saturday,6 hours yesterday and a good 9 today. I haven't ridden since Saturday and took Wednesday and Friday off last week. One of my riding buddies emailed me yesterday asking, "where were you today?" That was cool that someone missed seeing me there.

I had every intention of riding the trainer when I got home today, but still had an hour of work. By the time I wrapped that up, hubbies friends dropped in to play some music. So, I haven't gotten on the trainer tonight. I've been coming up with all kinds of excuses. Such a slacker.

And guess what else! I had a MIlky Way for dinner, along with a couple of peanut butter and crackers. Is that bad? Probably the worst kind of bad. But it is what it is now. In racing they say that you have to go slow to go fast. I wonder, can you translate this the same way, you gotta be bad to be good? ;-)

Time for a cold beer now, a night full of empty calories!

The journey continues

I had a good ride on Saturday. It was a 55 miler with about 15 cyclists. Cold day, decided on the way to the start that I wasn't going to have any breathing problems. Two puffs on the inhaler, spent 20 minutes breathing easy in the cold temps before taking off. No wheezing at all, during or after. Another cyclist did have an asthma attack early on. I think it scared a couple of people.

On another note, there are some things in life that need reflection and review. I've made several mistakes in my life, though I'd not change any of them. Can't say I'm proud of them either. There are some things we want, hope for, that at some point we realise need to put them aside. It's hard for me to do this. I've struggled against it too long. Almost requires a greiving process much like saying goodbye to cigarettes.

Today is a new day. Find the good stuff in it and realise how blessed I am.

Bad day?

We all have them. We all find ways to get through them. One way is to find inspiration from others that have it so much worse than you.

Jon Blais is one of those people. He was a triathlete struck by ALS. He kept such a positive outlook throughout his fight.

There are several poems and wise sayings on the site posted above. I hope some of it helps you. It has helped me immensely.

Funny how life works

My youngest had her gall bladder removed yesterday, outpatient. All went very well.

I went to trainer tours last night, thought I'd go easy. Hah! Still not happy with my lack of ability to do everything on the video, but was a great workout. Must've dropped 3 pounds in sweat.

Last night and this morning have been unique. Life has it's funny ways of twisting and turning. I wish I had more control, but that's a lesson I still need to study.

Long day, for a Monday

Took a long lunch hour so I could ride today. Glad I did, too. The sun shone and the weather was blowing from the South. Tomorrow is 58F but rain. Started at 7:30 and left the office at 5:30. Came home and worked for an hour and then a call for an hour.

I'm not complaining! I have a job. I am fortunate. So many are laying off right now.

My yongest is having gall bladder surgery in the am. It's time for her to get some relief!

Mother Nature has brought us winter weather

I'm not complaining. It's nice to have the air bite your skin for a change. Not thrilled about static eletricity but I can suffer a little.

One of the guys in the club, AB, has been such a mentor since I joined. He RCs the trainer tours and babysat me on the first club rides back in the spring. AB is 73 years young. A great guy! He asked me on Thursday night if I realised how far I've come riding my bike since the first of the year. Of course I do, I said. He told another person that I put him to shame recently on a ride, that he couldn't keep up with me. I think he was on his fixie, so maybe I had an edge with 23 more speeds and about 23 fewer years. :-) He told me that he put me in for most improved cyclist for the year. But he also was quick to say that he only gets one vote, so no way to know who will win it. I blushed and thanked him. I didn't know what the different awards are as I've not been to any annual banquets yet. I'm sure it will be fun. It's in January.

I've spent more and more time reflecting, reading, researching about life. My mom is very unhappy, losing her independence with driving. She has tried so hard to make us feel guilty. She's been so negative. I have to let this stuff go. I do what I can.

I've also been thinking about many of my relationships. How they are working or aren't. What do I want out of the rest of my life? New experiences for sure. I want to live, love, work hard, sweat, laugh, have fun in all things. I have desires that need fulfilling. A "bucket list" of items may be published at some point but not in it's entirety.

Has been a roller coaster of a week

Started the trainer tours on Tuesday and went back last night. Man do I have a lot of work to do! My cardio is not where I'd like to see along with my ability to spin at the cadence. A friend told me that I keep moving the bar and will never be satisfied. I hope so! It's not fun if it's easy. We need a challenge.

The week at work has been crammed full of tasks. I've stressed over trying to get this and then that wrapped up. Always depending upon others. I so miss being on a team. I can be so much more productive when other individuals are involved, sharing their ideas, having someone to bounce my ideas off of.

I've not sleep much. Too many nights waking and staying awake for an hour to two. Finally went to see the gyno again. Had a few items to discuss. She put me on a low dose estrogen that is topical not oral. I hope it works, but after two days, I've experienced worse power surges and sweats during the work day now! Patience!

On top of this of course it's been an emotional roller coaster of a week. Happy, sad, angry, crying for no reason, giddy, butterflies, flirting, horny, anxious, daydreaming a wonderful and scary mix of stuff!

One good thing from the docs is, I now weigh 148 pounds! Broke the 150 mark, now that heavier weight stays on the left and the smaller marks the pounds. I've gone from 172 in April 07 to this. Long, determined, life style change. Quitting smoking is good! Patience with yourself is imperative. We can all do this, if it is a desire.

Let me know how you are doing if you've made a change. Life is an adventure and should be fun!

The indoor season begins

The club Trainer Tours started last night. This is where members gather twice a week at a local church, bring their bikes and trainers or rollers, and sweat together for an hour. It never ceases to amaze me of some of these peoples physical ability and speed. You can't really tell on the open road like you can while they're on rollers or trainer.

I really had a great time. Started sweating bullets within 10 minutes of warmups. I felt so out of shape during this one. We had reps of sitting and standing which I need so much more work. About 35 minutes into the 45 minute workout, I developed cramping in my left calf and then my right which caused me to back off the intensity of bit.

Can't wait to get back out tomorrow and do it again though! It's amazing how good I feel these days, breathing easy. No smoke filled lungs for me any more. Very happy I quit tobacco.