So long 2010, Hello 2011

I've never liked endings. I hate to finish a book. I'll drag out the last two chapters for days sometimes. This year feels different for some reason. Well a big reason, but I won't spill those beans here for now.

I've had interesting time off. I've ridden, spent time with girls, Mom, and siblings. So very nice to have this time with family. For the last 30 some years this has been a very full week. Christmas, my ex-husband's birthday, our anniversary and New Year's all within 8 days. This was the first year I didn't say happy birthday to him since 1974. It's best, but feels very odd. 

I feel out of place. I have for months. Need to get comfy in my skin again. Working on it. Working on me. Just taking deep breaths, trying to find center and ground myself.

Time to set goals, working on that but have lots to do still.

Happy New Year to you all. May you find peace but most importantly, happiness.

 

Publish Post

so much to learn

today was great!  

first I shopped for sunglasses. I swear between HR monitors and sunglasses I am B R O K E! ha ha  I looked and tried on and asked questions, but one of my best friends took time with me and helped me find what I wanted.

went mtn biking with a friend on fire roads. 2 people, not in prime shape, but taking time, raising the heart rate well above threshhold, and just laughing having fun and getting to know each other a little better.

Then dinner with brother and sister, Something that took way too long to do. I thoroughly enjoyed it and was engrossed in all of the conversation. I now know why I miss them so much.

Wish I knew how to do love the right way. Maybe it will come, maybe it won't. But one thing is for sure, there are lot's of people in my life that I care for deeply. Maybe that should be the most important thing.


peace to all

The best gift

for me has nothing to do with wrappings and bows. I wanted what I always want: Time with family and friends. My girls gave me the most precious gift, time to spend with them. Late in the afternoon we gathered at daughter #1's place. We cooked, visited and chatted and caught up on each other's lives. Of course we ate. We ate from the time the door closed behind us until we pulled out of the drive. I'm still stuffed, 24 hours later. Leftovers might have something to do with that.

One of these days we'll get the whole family together, again. I'm starting to look at real estate. My apartment is small and inconvenient for entertaining. I've been invited to friend's parties over the last year and a half and I truly want to reciprocate. 

Another gift, I gave myself was time off the bike. I've only been off the bike like this when I broke my collar bone. Before today I'd ridden 3 times since my race in Bend. I've gained weight, gotten lazy and my hips ache and don't work so well. Today I got on the trainer for an hour. I plan to spend at least 2 hours on the bike most of the days from now to next week. I'm on vacation until next year! I need to get organized. I need to set some goals for 2011. Both for racing and for work and even personally. We'll see how this goes.

I hope everyone has received the gifts they wanted.

peace

 

End of year celebrations

Many of us celebrate differently, but most of us begin to reflect on the closing year and start to plan and set goals for the new one coming. 

I'm not a religious person, but respect those that are. Mostly, I want to be with family and friends. It's not so easy though. Work schedules are all over the place and the family has gotten fragmented. I'm thrilled to get to spend time with both my girls on Christmas. My oldest is hosting, very nice change of pace. The three of us have had lots of change over the last couple of years. I'm just grateful that we all are in the same town, love each other deeply and are able to make some time for our small family unit. 

To all of my family, friends and anyone that reads this:

much love to you. I wish for peace, serenity and above all happiness for us all. 

be well, laugh as much as you can and know you are loved deeply

peace

So, what's with

my face breaking out these days? My chin is a total mess. argh

oh, and I let my subscription to online dating expire. It was dumb to do it anyway. The 3  months the same people were recycled over and over. All of a sudden, once my subscription expires I have 20 emails, tons of winks (still most are over 60), etc. I swear I think it's a gimic to get me to re-up. Waste of time and money. 

I have decided I don't need to date. I'm completely clueless. And will just mess it up somehow. Besides, it seems I have no idea how to meet guys. I'm not hanging in bars.

Back to work and bike riding all the time once the weekend holiday is over. 

peace
namaste 

I'd trade it all

right now for a quiet evening with a gentle companion putting an arm around my shoulder and a chest I can to snuggle into.

pipedreams

back to bikes and work tomorrow!!!!




I tell myself, it can be simple and easy. not so sure that's reality though. mostly 'cause it's not all up to me. but why not? just spend time here and there. 

2010 CX Nationals, Bend OR part 3

So I left out some stuff. Thursday afternoon saw the first Singlespeed Championships @ Natz. What a race! Craig Alexander dominated, while wearing blue jean cutoffs. Did I mention that sunsets about 4:30 and it's pitch by 5:00? probably, so I repeat somethings and leave out others.

"running" up stairs @ Bend

I called B2 to let him know I would be happy to work the pit or be support for his race. Said he wasn't going to use the pit but I could grab his stuff at the start line. Just so happened one of the kids loaned him a pit bike. This was good as he needed it on the first lap. But he was able to pass quite a few once back on the course. His was another fun race to watch. Tilford dominated the race. It was raining at the start but by mid first lap had changed to snow, some of the biggest flakes I'd seen in a while. Temps dropped and snow filled the air. I'm glad I was able to support. That's what team mates are all about, right? well, friends too.

I missed a lot of the next race, but another Louisville cyclist was in that one. We cheered and rang our cowbells for him, too. Next came the 17/18 year olds. Two local boys from Red Zone and another from the Lionhearts were in this race. So exciting to watch! D2 came in third and his team mate came in 11th, barely missing top ten but had a most exciting race. When finished he was completely brown with mud and said his eyelids were frozen open due to the mud sticking to them. D2 left today for Eurocamp and is representing the US on Sunday at the world cup. Go D2!! 

Later in the afternoon they held the U23 race and another local male cyclist raced. I missed the majority of this one too. Then the last race of the day we had two more locals in the 30-34 AG. A fun race to cheer and run around the course trying to catch glimpses.

There are some great videos of the actions at http://www.cyclingdirt.org/video and photographs at http://galleries.cascadeeventphotography.com/g/2010_cx_nats
After the races, CAO and I went back to the room, cleaned up, packed, ate, napped and then went back for the Clydesdale races at 9:30 and the after party. Fun times. It was midnight before we hit the bed and set our alarms to get up at 4:15 to leave by 5 am. Her phone rang at 4, the airline saying her 2nd leg from Chicago to Cincy was cancelled. All workd out well in the end and she was able to reroute through Houston. 

Next year is in Madison, WI. I have a feeling it will be a very cold week as it will be 2nd week of January 2012. (not sure why they had to move the dates) It's within driving distance. So, I'll have to see if I can find another crazy person to drive up and share expenses.

I put my shoes and helmet on the trailer with my bike. I've wanted to ride my mtn bike since I got home, but have no shoes. so dumb But I'll drive to Cincy this weekend and pick up my stuff. A few friends that live up there are talking about a mtn bike ride on Saturday. I hope I can join them if logistics work out. 

I think I'm gonna miss my CX friends for the next months. I'll have to find something else to fill my weekends. I hope weather permits outdoor riding, but it looks like lots of trainer time for now. Next couple of weeks I need to think about goals for 2011, both personal and cycling. Need to start looking for permanent abode as well. Time to settle down, buy some furniture, unpack and get comfy.


peace everyone




CX Rules!!!