It's so easy to think of smoking

Each time a stressful event happens. I think I've had plenty since last July. My oldest found a lump last summer, then married in September. My sister found true love and married. My Mom is losing her vision and can no longer drive. My youngest daughter just went through surgery to discover that she does not have endometriosis.

My change of life craziness doesn't help at all. Hormone shifts causing weeping moments out of the blue. Some of the time I have such trouble focusing. Wishing for things that I shouldn't.

Work has it's own trials. Too much to do for one person. Just lost a number of good people.

I just had a fantasy of grabbing one of my husbands cigarettes. I'd really like to hold one between my fingers and smell the length of it. It's been over 15 months! I won't do it. I can't. I've come way too far.

It's Halloween and I should be laughing! At least tomorrow I can get out and ride. We are having unbelievable weather again. 70s and sunny with no rain in sight.

End of the year - should be fun - can be stressful -- Very Full Of Stress!

I thought I should post a warning to everyone that is either trying to quit smoking or have already quit in the last months.

This is a very stressful time of year for some (a lot) people. We put off the inevitable like shopping, decorating, mailing Christmas cards and so many more task. (I've bought 4 gifts to date). Money can be tight and the pressure to spend on others can be stressful. Relationship strains make us sad if we won't see loved ones this time of year. The loss of a friend or loved one in the recent past makes this time of year much more difficult and leaves an empty place.

Monday and Tuesday tested my will power. But Wednesday I wanted a cigarette all day long. I haven't had an urge like this since August! I didn't smoke, I kept trying my old diversions: Dum dums, chewing gum, nice walk in fresh air, mini altoids, finding alternative things to focus my attention. It just kept coming back. I made it through and I didn't succomb, but it was scary. Monday was 21 weeks since my last cigarette! This just goes to show how there are still triggers ready to tempt you.

I'll be sending out all the good karma and smoke-free thoughts to all of my 'quit-buddies' for this holiday season.
Merry Christmas to everyone!

I'm so grateful I found you guys and Chantix!

So I posted the earlier post and need to expand a bit

My oldest is getting married on 1 Sept. She and fiance' were here last night and we had lots of emotions. Crying, yelling, saying things we shouldn't have. Stressed because it's so close to the wedding. Stressed because of youngest daughter. We went round and round for a while. I had a couple of beers throughout. I still haven't smoked! At one point I really wanted a cigarette. I could've broken down and grabbed one of Hubbie's. Nah, last night at 10 was 28 days. 4 whole weeks! Not starting over now. If I can survive last night, I'm more confident than ever.

Don't get me wrong. I still had urges today. My gf's schedule conflicted with mine, so I walked the block by myself.

After hitting a record of 21 days in a row in the 90's, we only made 87 today. Hallelujah! Now I'm starting to wonder what I'm gonna do when I need to walk and it's 20F outside. Maybe I'll take the stairs, we have 26 floors. Could be good work out for the glutes. :-)